JOE IS DYING

Johanna is starting a new self project, it's called quiet. It's about minimizing the noises around me, the noise inside my head. To learn to listen to God, to my heart, and to begin feeling. How is it going to look like? 1. Stop talking to myself, or to the air, or to imaginary people. 2. Try to quietly ponder. I tried it today (being quiet) while waiting for the bus. I looked around me and listened, I watched the busses went by, and a sense of peace and gratefulness came over me. For no apparent reason. Or maybe, for being where I am. Somewhere I'm supposed to be.

So, we're getting pretty serious on this motionography deal, huh? Guess it's time to set aside some real money to get a DSLR that shoots video. Let's push. Let's not settle. "never settle on ok"- that's my new motto. If we are made for glory, then glorious things we shall do.

Jadi, bagainmana rasanya kerja di sini? Udah hampir dua bulan gua kerja disini (unless dihitung dari jaman gua intern disini.. 1/2 taon), dan sejauh ini rasanya sangat menyenangkan. For one, gua bisa kerja dengan orang2 yang super talented, dan baek2. (Tangent: aneh ya, nulis pake bahasa indo. the way the letters held up against each other is different) As kimbra says, they challenge me in the best way. Gua nga give up hope, atau jadi pengen keluar karena merasa ngak berharga, but they push me and guide me very smartly. Pernah sih kena semprot sekali, but it wasn't a biggie. Salah gua, dan gua blajar dari sana. Hari ini ulang tahunnya si pianis yang jago koding. Namanya bob, tapi nama aslinya eric. lol banget nga sih? Gua merasa bersalah karena gua udah janji mau beliin whiskey buat dia, tapi karena wallet gua nga jelas sembunyi dimana (dan nga punya duit di bank) akhirnya gua tidur dengan perasaan was-was. But, when i came to work today, si ganteng ternyata beliin di...

Ci Ika sekarang lagi dirumah sakit..  Cervixnya udah dilate for 2cm, and she's still got 2 months to go if she wants to do a full 9 month term. Keeping her and Ko iman in my prayers. God, please keep Baby A and Baby B safe, growing and healthy in Ci Ika's womb until your best of time. I trust you Jesus. I've been here since 5pm now. The kids are having dinner at Honey Court. But since their cars are pretty filled up, I'm waiting at the hospy until 11. Really grateful that Eilene (the nurse) didn't kick me out. We've got 45 minutes to go - ish. Updates from le work place, I currently work at krs (nama tempat-nya gua singkat biar nga ke google for precautions). I made sure today that Rob and Randall remember that they can always delegate any kinds of work to me. I'm great at motion stuff, but if they need help with moodboarding and designing websites.. sure. Hope I don't disappoint. Again, this worrying part of me goes "eeks", but I gotta kno...

U kno, one of the best things about living in Seattle is that I get to stretch my heart and learn to love. Yes, yes, i know i havent reached the end of my stay here to bring 4 years into conclusion, but as the years have shown thus far, seattle is teaching me how to love and how to cherish those moments. Like how i spent my birthday today and how the people celebrate with me. Cakes in the morning with 4 of my favorite ladies, talks and laughs at 12am with the masmans and half of the yesler boys (sakaw and theo), chill time with cine after wok, trus small dinner eith my lovely cg and movies with the big downtown family. I mean, god, you bless me beyond my imagination! These people are the sweetest, funniest and cutest creatures out there. And i know, coming from Johanna those compliments sounded unreal, but it took 4 years to bring me to love that way. Ask me 3 years ago if my “friends” are that lovable, i could say i cant even fathom that. My prayer and my wish for my birthday ...

stories: real, inspiring, reflective, generate change. take time to listen. take time to think. the word "hope" sounds very current, modern, also utopian. yet, it's the sound of the beginning of days. the continuum of the universe. it begins with a flicker of imagination, a bright light of many colors at the first day of the galaxy. the same word will resound when fire burns old foundations to ashes. when our omega comes. this word matters when you have it, or lack it. maybe that's what humanity been fighting for; to see hope, to have hope, to find hope.

Reading my group emails today made me anxious. first i missed a meeting because i didn't check my email before leaving the house for easter service. completely forgot about it. Came back, read like 4-5 emails with different subjects (i don't know why these kids keep doing this) and two corresponding ones had HUGE dramas going on. bikin M A R A H #*@&%$KIDS!^%$#* nga bisa apa chill-an dikit, give some time. atau yg satunya, nga bisa apa langsung bales e-mail. mesti di push down pride-nya, baru marah2 trus submit kerjaan. BZAH!!!

As a part of my procrastination today, I will talk about perfumes that I like: 1. White Tea and Ginger by Bath and Body Works: When I'm wearing this I feel independent, stable, and focused. I used this in high school, re-purchase this when a BBW classic scents sale came up last year. This is definitely a comfortable scent for me. It smells fresh, and clean (more in the leafy range). Tones in this body spray:  Yuzu, Lemon, Green Tea, Bergamot, Geranium, Nutmeg, Rose, Earl Grey Tea, Musk, Woods, Berries.  You can definitely smell the lemon and green tea in here. Not much of musk, woods or berries - imo. 2. Brit Sheer by Burberry: When I'm wearing this, I feel feminine, soft and quiet. I bought the roll on version of this, because I wasn't sure if I would like it, or have the time to finish the whole bottle before getting bored. It is light and floral. Fresh on first spray (or roll, in my case) with hints of sweet fruits like pear, and lychee. For some reason, I ...

Hari ini gua baru kerja dikit di indo cafe (kerjain projek akhir, sambil ngemil batagor). Dengerin obrolannya Angie and Adrian tentang orang2 yg ud di Seattle dr jaman awal 2000-an, gua jadi mikir... Am I ready to settle down in a place of transition? Seattle is a place of transition. A lot of my friends will not stay for a long time in the states. Four to six years max, and they move back to our beautifully, corrupted homeland. Gua ngak tau apakah Tuhan bakal bawa gua untuk balik ke kota macet itu lagi, atau jahit gua ke amerika (jadi bagian tambalan baru ke negara yang hampir musnah ini - IMHO. Maaf orang2 amerika, gua nga percaya sama ekonomi kalian). Di pikiran gua, gua pengen menetap bareng temen2 yang bakal grow old sama gua. Ngak lucu dong, kalo gua hang out sama anak2 college melulu - padahal gua ud bangkotan dan punya momongan. Cuma, ya, apa sih yang gua tau tentang masa depan. Berharap aja ngak yakin. On the other hand, sekarang gua super sibuk. Banyak kerjaan yang ...

Apparently masih banyak yang harus dikerjain sebelum bisa masuk ke weekend. contohnya: harus buat artist statement untuk BFA show, terus bikin storyboard buat scripts, bikin characters buat animation and work on my freelance work. wah lumayan banyak ya, on our plate. minggu depan gua juga ada ministry. ini saatnya untuk STOP being IDLE and work on things by thorough planning. i am fueling myself with soda currently. because i know i can't take coffee. warm drinks = comfortable. caffeine = unfocused. coffee = comfortably distracted. ^^ eniwei. im going to work on another thing, while waiting till 5 to go home. straight to church. god's blessings im countin! thank you ~

inspired:   one more http://youtu.be/vDGrfhJH1P4

it's almost 3, and i'm at the end of my energy. i should've eaten the whole sub, but i didn't cuz i concerned abt how polite i eat. uigh, so indo, me.

#THANK YOU delivered from something this close your love never fails never gives up never runs out on me

waiting. what to do while i wait? worship.

Because you never forget you will remain and you will stay loving strong providing greatly immeasurable is the way you make me yours you are god and i am filled with praise my heart it beats and it thumps with every words i could say or the intangible whispers that you hear i am on the floor grateful unswayable your hands over me immovable once you chose me surely i am marked surely i am pierced yours

I love you I've never loved you like this like your name is a song in my heart a song the universe sings with yes my eyes had seen but my heart is still young too young to feel with courage too timid to say sorry when i fail i am honored that you let me with baby steps walk towards you sometimes dance sometimes crying head down still this heart beats in every seconds for your name, for your love you had shown me mercy through every seconds i passed yawning blank eyes watching the blinking screen goes technicolor tomorrow i won't waste it you've thawed me out don't let the snow freeze me again you're my source of being I love you, I keep you on my heart, on my lips burn my hands with your seal mark me yours, my ears pierced it

Hari pertama sekolah, 1/2 hari doang karena ada 'chance' of snow. Lucunya, di downtown (which is where my school is located) nga snowing, sedangkan di rumah sempet snow sebentar. pas gua pulang jam 3 sore, udah nga ada snow. tapi semuanya tetep putih. Katanya, malem ini bakal ada snow storm. Gua sih nga kepengen besok snow karena, besok gua harus nge-bus ke pioneer square and that'd be a pain in the ass getting through snow. So.. let's hope for the best :) nervous buat besok. but excitement will prevail? hope so.

Dalam waktu satu minggu, adek gua bakal cabut ke TX. Kondisi keuangan nampaknya ngak memungkinkan, tapi, hidup penuh harapan emang banyak cost-nya. Sekarang pertanyaanya, lu mau ngeliat kondisi lu skrg dan worry, atau ngeliat ke Tuhan dan percaya? When He tells you the direction, you follow and rejoice. -- Hasn't hit me yet, but will tomorrow. Download my new cover: http://soundcloud.com/tresdivine/while-we-wait-jack-johnson First time ever I produce a cover song. Still very very rough though.

Gua ngak punya kredensial apapun untuk ngomongin tentang cinta. cuma kalo kata suka boleh dong bilang2. mungkin besok gua akan telpon salon untuk potong rambut, setelah 3 tahun potong rambut sendiri. senang banget masih libur :)

Hello 2012. Dania bulang gua kalo nulis itu seperti pake bulleted points. Saya setuju. pendek dan teratur supaya gampang dan cepet dibaca. Cuma mau kasi oleh2 dari tahun 2011, gua sama theo mencover lagu korea. mohon maaf kalo rada nga sesuai selera anda.. masih harus blajar banyak! in the mean time, enjoy :) http://youtu.be/RZOPm5RgC8s